Elephant
I wasn’t going to make a post like this.
I quietly and gradually came out on social media, over the first half of 2022. As a binary trans guy who just wants to functionally disappear and live my life and is also pretty exhausted with the social effort of disclosing, over and over, exactly precisely how trans I am on dating apps, etc., I just wanted to let readers figure out where I was vs making another awkward, formal announcement. I figured it was easily assembled via my Twitter, my presence in the comments on here and on the Discord, and anyway it makes very little material difference to the comic, which is what people are here on this website for.
But it’s getting harder to sit quietly with people seeing me in the comments, replying as who I am, and then responding to me or someone else with my old name. More importantly, in the current climate of unprecedented attacks on my rights in states all over the US, where I live, being stealth, being silent, is a privilege, even a luxury, a safety net not everyone like me has. My people are being effectively Othered by a narrative positioning us as child predators; the Arkansas Senate just passed a bill that would by its phrasing make me a felon if I use a public restroom with my own son who needs to go. So it feels important you know we’re not child groomers; we’re the dude who makes the comic you read with the magic horses and cowboys, who takes his kid to the dentist on a Wednesday morning and writes stilted coming out posts from the waiting room. We’re trans and we’re also regular ass people just existing out here. Half of you didn’t even notice I’ve been an out trans guy for an age at this point, that’s how regular my ass is. Now please stop calling me by my old name in the comments, and please resist, to the best of your individual ability, the rising tide of bullshit looking to strip me and people like me of some of our most basic rights in whatever state or country you call home.
So hi. I’m EE “Ben” Mehlos. Don’t get it twisted. I hope we’re still friends and partners in storytelling, but if not, if you can’t hang with it, don’t let the door hit you in the ass on your way out; you aren’t the first, you won’t be the last, and I will likely notice you’re gone about as hard as you noticed who’s been making Next Town Over. 💖
—Ben
Hello Ben. Love your work on NTO. Much love and please keep NTO coming!
🫶
I follow the comic but am not on Twitter or Discord, and don’t always read the posts, so I was completely unaware of your status. My apologies if any of my previous comments misrepresented you. As long as the art and storytelling maintains the same high quality I’ve all come to appreciate, I have no reason at all to bail on the site. Have a pleasant day and hopefully your son doesn’t have any cavities.
Cavity-free, thank you, and thank you for having stuck around for actual decades 😂
Howdy Ben! glad you did this, i definitely would have kept writing your old name, unaware! otherwise nothing’s changed, still top notch story teller and artist. this and hells corners were/are daily checks for me, keep up the awesome!
I appreciate you’ve been around all these aeons. I still treasure the fanart you did. Thanks so much for the support 💖
Ben! I’m Far too ANTI-Social for Social Media, so Call me Oblivious. The last Time I can recall speaking to you Directly and calling You by Name, I was Asking your Permission to Discus your then Serious Medical Difficulties, with Your New Fans on the Napalm Luck Forum. If I have more Recently, I apologize. An old friend on the Forum, Cobra. His Alter Kim is a More Accurate Avatar of the Inside of Who They Are. Cobra/Kim has a Wife and Family. We corresponded for years on Napalm Luck, and They considered me a Good Enough Friend that They, Out of the Blue …
I told Cobra/Kim MY only regret, was that I was too Polite to Ask, What, if I’m Honest, I was not Surprised to Discover. I said that I was VERY Flattered that They Trusted Me This Much. I said I was only Sorry I had made it more difficult for Them … Oblivious.
I assured Them. and was Pleasantly Surprised that I Meant Every Word:
It was No effort at ALL, and the tiniest of Mental Shifts [almost a Shrug] to think of Them as the Same Delightfully Whimsical Pixie, I’d always Known.
Ben, You are a Fabulous Writer! Vane Black, and John Henry Hunter Ring Solidly TRUE as Female, Male, and 2 Faces of the Self Same Coin, Spinning on a Table Top. I can easily see much of Your Face in Either or Both of Theirs. I Have, Always Felt H.H.R. the most Sympatetic. He really IS a Terrible Villain [the Very Best Kind!] Just a Die Hard Fan of Vincent, I Guess.
Thanks so much for this, and for all the kind words over the years. I didn’t really realize as I was posting this how much it would actually mean to me to have longtime readers reply with messages of support but it super does as it turns out. 🙏
HUZZAHS! Be your goddamned self and let us stick our fingers in the eyes of any who disapprove!
You’ve given us a terrific story with incredible art and while “on the internet nobody knows you’re a dog” remains mostly true, why hide?
Glad you’re you, Ben. May your future be a terribly happy one.
Very much obliged, gyffes 🙏
All the best to you, Ben! Hope everything will turn out well for you in the near and far future.
I don’t think I’ve commented before here on-site (we did have some brief interactions on Twitter a long time ago, though), but I’ve been eagerly reading along!
I hope to see more of the comic soon, but take it easy, too, with all the toxic and transphobic shit being hurled at you it can’t be easy to just exist sometimes.
Thank you so much Sophie and yeah I think we’re Twitter mutuals; I ended up reading Soul’s Journey I think because I was looking for a hot minute for a flatter but first I gave the gig to a friend and then I was just too slow and broke to pay anyone for flats. lol. Thanks so much for sticking it out; I very much hope to close out NTO this year at long last. 💖
i’ve been reading for years and bought books and pins, but i’m entirely absent from social media and, mostly, from the comments section, so i’ve been oblivious until now. i am, however, in much the same position, so i understand! best wishes!
Thank you, for both the financial support and the kind words and best wishes to you as well 🙏
Best wishes Ben
Much obliged and best wishes to you as well!
It’s a hard time for the whole LGBT community but it’s a really bad time to be trans. Stay strong, you are not alone (Transwoman here.)
You too, and thank you ❤️
Your art and stories are phenomenal, I hope someday that my stories will be as captivating as yours. I hate that we live in a world where people have to fight to be themselves. The next generation will be better than the last.
Dave
Thanks so much, Dave, and hopefully so ❤️
Hey, Ben.
Thank you for all the beautiful work on NTO; it is a gift and you are wonderful for giving it. While I appreciate you coming out, it doesn’t change my perception of you, which is that you’re a talented and interesting artist & storyteller. Here’s to you keeping safe and keeping on.
Best Wishes (and I’ve joined the patreon), –Brad.
Hi Ben!
I don’t know you personally, and most likely never will. I don’t care about your gender identity / sexual preferences, or whatever is bothering other people. I like your comic, it is great! It is somewhat sad that the pure enjoyment of it is overshadowed to some people by irrelevant things (they actually have no business on judging).
Good luck on any battles you have to fight, may it not be as tragic as our protagonists’ here! 🙂
The comic is really great, did I mention that? Yeah, I probably did. That is all what matters to us, “regular ass people”.
Thanks much from one regular ass person to another 🙂
Great story, very (very!) good art. Your life, however, is your business – not mine. What’s important is that you’re happy with where you’re at and where you’re going. Best of luck with your future!
🙏
Hi Ben! I had no idea until reading this post, but I LOVE that you are you, and that you are willing to share so much of yourself with us. I know we’re coming close to the end of NTO and it’s been a wild ride, and I look forward to following you into the next project – which appears to be going full steam ahead!
Thanks so much; it means a ton coming from people who’ve variously supported me/NTO over the years as much as you have; there’s always a vague fear of like, perceived betrayal? when coming out to anyone who has invested or even feels like they’ve invested in you and your life. Much appreciated, for real. 🙏
Been here for a decade reading your work and the least i could pay you is referring to you as you expect.
It doesn’t cost me anything to be respectful to you, Ben. if anything, i’m very grateful for your work
Carry on, your life should be as normal as everyone else’s
Thanks so much, for your support on here and on the Twitters 🙏
as a long time fan i had no clue, and HAVE no clue about what it’s like, but you do you and f**k anybody who has a problem with it
Very much obliged ❤️
Hopefully this comes across in the positive intent it was meant and not a “Not all…” post. I’m bad with words.
I never read the comments and only occasionally read your posts, Ben, so have no real idea who you are now or then. 🙂 That said, I want you to know that there are those of us who are fighting for your rights. I know it’s not much, but we do see you and agree that you should be able to just live your life.
Comes across fine and allies are always appreciated; thank you so much for the support ❤️
For what’s it’s worth from an anon internet stranger; I will do all that I can to fight for yours and everyone’s rights to live a life untethered from unwarranted hatred and stigma.
Good luck with all the bullshit of this world my friend. I am pulling for you and so many others.
From one storyteller to another, thank you for a wild and rambunctious ride and all the best for future endeavors.
I run the Four Winds Storytellers’ Library, 6000 volumes of folktales, as a resource for traditional storytellers, writers or anyone who wants to explore the vast riches of the old oral stories from the past that survived to the world of print. In The Four Winds there are folktales of men that become women, women who are transformed into men, same sex bonds and relationships that were disguised as friendships by the recorders of the tales.
It was these stories that taught me that there are many ways of knowing who we can be and the many ways we can relate to each other long before I encountered the LGBT world.
Thank you Ben, and I look forward to ‘The Next Story Over’
🫶
Hey Ben,
I been here not quite since the beginning, and your story telling is fucking fantastic. And you are incredibly awesome. Thank you for being you and sharing so much with us.
Hey ben, been here since issue 2 and winced at every moment of every horse torture scene. Loved every minute of it. I am not on any social media so this was the first I heard of anything but you keep doing you and making this comic awesome. Literally have been coming to check in on NTO 3 times a week for a long ass time.
Hi Ben!
As a T-total anti-social-media-ist, I don’t *have* any of those website/app/thingies you mentioned, but I love your work and am always happy to comment on your awesome art and storytelling! <3 Best of luck to you, you'll probably *need* it dealing with the crazies who mistakenly believe that your internal feelings of person-hood are somehow their look-out.
Welp – didn’t notice – don’t care. Be you. That’s all that matters.
I’ll keep reading.
Hi Ben, like a lot of folk here I don’t do social media so had no idea, I’ve just been coming here diligently for years to read a great story.
I don’t understand the hate directed at trans people, I know it will get better and I hope it will do so sooner rather than later.
Hi Ben!
Like many others here I don’t do social media so I only found out this now, but I wanted to take the time and tell you not only I still really enjoy the comic after all this years, but also wish you all the best in your life.
I know finally coming out “officially” is a scary step but I wanted to reassure you we’re right besides you.
One of my best friends is a trans man who, finally, finally cut off contact with his parents after many years of hoping to bring them round (they’d do subtle things like “accidentally” dead-naming him, or getting him feminine clothing as a gift and other such things), so I can only hope that your family is a whole lot better than his and give you the support you actually deserve.
And seriously the bigoted cockwombles who invented the whole thing about “trans people being groomers” (wanna bet that’s projection? ) can go bugger themselves with a hedgehog.
Also, I think I should go relabel the books you gave me with your proper name. The signature already reads “E”, so that’s fine, not that I was going to mess with it, ’cause messing with a guy’s signature is usually grounds for a duel…
Cheers, Alex
Hi Ben! I’m a born lurker, so I don’t follow much on social media unless you’re the official Pokemon Go account. I just want you to know you are a beautiful person inside and out and I love your comic so much.
Okay, back to lurking. *gets swallowed up by an html bush*